It's a funny thing, perception is. It's not funny like, "If it's not about elephants, it's irrelephant," but you know, figuratively speaking.
I tweaked my hamstring the other day, not sure exactly when. I first noticed it as something more than tightness when jumping over an obstacle on Friday's terrible run. I rode without issue Sunday, but Monday morning's tempo run brought on something worse. It's nothing bad, not a tear, just a strain. But ... perception.
Monday night I already felt fat and ... doughy. I looked in the mirror Monday night and complained that my jelly belly just isn't going away. I was restless in my sleep and dreamed of gaining a ton of weight and having to start over, again. I woke up cranky, thinking about how I had an inside-straight's chance of even participating in Sunday's race.
And it's all an emotional response to a perception that doesn't align with reality. This morning I put on my skinny belt and without realizing it, fastened it a hole smaller than ever before. I probably won't be able to participate in Sunday's race, but it's just a "fun" race for me anyway, nothing I'm training for.
Often our greatest assets cause our biggest problems. For me, I'm an "all chips in," person. And when I'm feeling emotionally charged, things get done. But, when I'm feeling down, I sometimes covet self-defeating thoughts.
Last night my wife made four loaves of cinnamon bread and a batch of homemade pretzels. Today I get an email regarding Sunday's race ... a four miler through Old Tucson Studios...it sounds SO FREAKIN' FUN!
But sometime between the pretzels (I had just one small one), and the email, I realized that I was off in my perceptions. The stars aren't aligned against me. This isn't a confluence of circumstances temping me to be fat and sassy.
I can't change the hand I'm dealt, but this isn't all garbage. I'm going to make something good of this. Instead of my next upcoming runs, I'm hitting the gym. I'll be doing four sessions of circuit training this week instead of two. I'll be using the ARC machine (it's like a stairstepper/elliptical combination). I'll skip today's ride and sit on ice instead, but afterwards, I should have no problems (funny how you can have leg injuries exclusive to either running or riding).
Because of recent experiences both running and reading, I want to change my current approach anyway, but didn't want to throw out my current plan. Well, now I have the time.
I'm still going to nail the duathalon on 2/18 and enjoy myself on a trail half marathon on 3/11. And none of this will have any impact on my bicycle race on 4/28, provided I don't fold.
Until then, I'm going to stay away from those pretzels!